16 Things I Learned In 16 Years

I recently celebrated my sixteenth birthday, which seems like a huge jump! Sixteen is a huge milestone, and I wanted to share a few thoughts about what I have learned in the past few years, everything from friendships to life advice.

1. Embrace the little things in life!

It really is true that the days are long and the years are short, time does fly by! It’s important to enjoy and soak up the season you’re in, because it goes by quickly. Don’t miss the little things in life; the family car rides, the football games, the mother-daughter coffee dates, or the impromptu Zestos’ trips!

2. Listen to your parents

Over the years, I have come to recognize that my parents are the people who love me the most, who unconditionally love and support me and model what it looks like to live out my faith. I’m blessed with amazing parents; my dad is one of the most patient, God-fearing, wise, and caring people I know, and I look up to him so much! My mother is my twin, my secret-keeper, and my advice-giver. She’s a Renaissance woman – always taking up a new hobby – and cares for our family so well!

3. Think twice, speak once

Oh, if I had a penny for every time I’ve spoken hurtful words out of anger and my tongue has gotten me in trouble I would be rich! We all have a tendency to say hurtful words in a height of emotion, and words can be forgiven but not forgotten. Words are permanent; compliments can build someone up for the rest of their life, but insults can deeply wound someone for a long time. Choose your words carefully, so that what you say reflects Christ and draws others closer to Him.

4. Choose good friends

If you want to know what a girl is like, look to her friends. Friends shape who you are and who you will be, so choose wisely. Surround yourself with like-minded girls who will encourage you…and invest in them too! Get to know your friends and pour into them, for they will influence you for the better or worse. It’s so much easier to pursue godly living if you’re doing it with people who are striving towards the same goal! If you want to know how to recognize good friends, ask yourself how you feel after hanging out with them – do you feel blessed and encouraged, or relieved and stressed?

5. Learn to listen

One of the most sincere things a friend can do is give their time to someone, to simply listen to someone. Instead of rushing off from church to grab brunch, stop to ask someone about their life – it is so meaningful and will make their day!

6. Prioritize personal devotions

This one should really be at the top, because quiet time with the Lord is vital! When I wake up just 15 minutes earlier and spend a few minutes reading my Bible and prayer journaling, it reshapes my perspective on the day and makes me more loving! It changes my early-morning grumpiness to grace.Time well spent with Jesus refills our cup of the fruits of the Spirit so that we are enabled to go out and be a light for Christ.

7. Reach out to people

Last year was my first year in a new private school and I only knew a handful of people. I remember intentionally going up and introducing myself to people a lot during the first week. Knowing what it feels like to be the new kid on campus has given me a heart for other incoming students; that experience has given me confidence to walk up to new students and get to know them. I remember one such occasion last year, when I noticed a new girl the first day of second semester – I got up the courage to reach out to her in passing and welcomed her to the school. I didn’t know it at the time, but we have come to be super close friends and are involved in classes and sports together! So you never know what saying hello to someone could mean to them, or what the outcome might be!

8. Nuture a love for reading

My mother has modeled this so well, as she took us to the Main Library located in our local downtown area when we were little. I have so many happy memories of browsing the towering isles of books and becoming swept up in a story. Books are tiny masterpieces, little snippets of people’s deepest thoughts poured out upon a page into your own hands. There are so many fantastic books to choose from, from historical fiction to fantasy to comics!

If you need recommendations, here’s the link my blog post about summer reading. 🙂 https://seaofstyle.com/summer-reading-list/

9. Don’t fall into the comparison trap

I think all of us consciously or unconsciously struggle with comparison; we struggle with both trying to measure up to others’ standards, or worse yet, thinking of ourselves better than others. First, you can’t be someone else, because you will never be better at being them than they already are (I hope that wasn’t confusing!). Remind yourself of where your worth lies, where your identity stems from, which is from God and how He defines you.

10. You can’t ever have enough shoes

Ladies…you really can’t. Shoes are the best accessory to determine how dressy or casual you want an outfit to be. If someone asked me to choose one fall shoe, I couldn’t do it! I have at least one pair of booties, riding boots, sneakers, flats, and heals…at least! Shoes are also the best way to try trends or give a modern flair to outfits.

11. God will use your weaknesses

2 Corinthians 12:9 – ‘But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.’

We all struggle with something, whether it be insecurities or family tension or disorders. The good news is that God uses those weaknesses for His purposes and for His good. When our eyes are opened to how truly broken we are, we can finally see how amazingly perfect Jesus is! When our struggles are weighty, we can depend on God to supply strength, for He is big enough for our burdens. God will use our weaknesses to not only make us lean on Him, but also to demonstrate His power and bring Him glory. Our “thorns in the flesh” also give us compassion for others dealing with similar struggles.

12. Make time for your siblings.

This might be the hardest for me, as I’m so prone to prioritize school and achieving high grades over spending quality time with my siblings, the ones who I’m going to know for the rest of my life! There have been so many times I’ve had to say no to playing Monopoly or walking to the park because I am so focused on what I need to do. Take advantage of the time when you don’t have to study for an upcoming test, and spend time with your siblings. It can be as simple as going on a bike ride or baking cookies together.

13. Leave an imprint

When you transition to a new school, church, program, etc., ask yourself – what legacy did I leave? Did I make an impact on the people, did I invest in that activity for the better? Don’t miss out on opportunities to invest in the future of a program and to leave an indelible impression of how you contributed.

14. Find a mentor

Finding a mentor to advise you through your teen years is so important! Having someone to keep you accountable and who you can look up to is crucial; whether it be a favorite teacher, an older friend, or a youth leader at your church, ask someone you trust to be your mentor. It’s tricky to stay grounded in your faith and navigate high school while juggling academic, athletic, and extra-curricular activities, so a mentor who genuinely cares about you and can guide you is such a blessing.

15. Get outside

I always feel refreshed and energized after getting out in the sunshine and getting my daily dose of vitamin D. Especially during fall, the weather is amazing and I love doing homework on our back porch while enjoying the evening breeze. Power walking, biking, or running are great ways to get your blood flowing and enjoy the fresh air.

16. Laughter is the best medicine

Whether you’re depressed, angry, embarrassed, or anything in between, laughter really is the best medicine to help with the tears and the hurt! There have been many times I’ll trip in the hallway and send books flying, but friends laughing with me turns the embarrassment into something humorous. Not only has laughter been medically proven to release positive endorphins that improve your mood, but laughter has also been emotionally proven to cope with negative emotions and change your mood.

I’ll leave you with a quote about growing up from a favorite author, which I hope inspires you to continue to dream big, to shoot for the stars, for with God all things are possible!

“I think she is growing up, and so begins to dream dreams, and have hopes and fears and fidgets, without knowing why or being able to explain them.”
― Louisa May Alcott

Warmly,

Seabrook